Black 1992 Honda Accord w/ tinted windows (for sex)

I'm going to chronicle my trying to get a car, and that will probably help me actually get one!  What a fcking great idea.  I'm seriously haven't been trying to get one for a long time.  So now you're all my witnesses.  This is the plan:

First off in order to get the car I must know how to drive, or I will have no desire to make the effort to save (for the car). 

In order to know how to drive and be allowed legally I must go to driving school, and to do that I must get a permit. 

(can a permit and driving school be seen as one thing?)

So get a permit.

Go to driving school.

Take the driving test.

Save money while searching for the right car (looking for an old honda accord, something modest).

Then comes the verifications, and the set ups:

I have to have temporary vehicle insurance (I don't know how to do that)

Have the car checked by a mechanic (where?)

Vehicle history report

Make sure I have other stuff I might need (pink slip, etc.)

Test drive

Research legal stuff, rights, whatever.

And throughout the entire process learn about cars enough to make an informed decision.  (start by looking at car specs and finding out what they mean, simultaneously going through lessons)

Something like this.

But the first step is to learn to drive, and that means getting the license, which means in order to get to the school to get the permit.  That means if I have a permit I can learn to drive so I can pass the driving test and get my license, so that I will have learned to drive and now I can look to buy a car. 

The first step is to make sure I know the handbook and pass the first test. 

Why is this so hard for me?  You might ask.  I'm not sure.

I don't know anything about vehicle insurance and so I will have to look at different insurance providers later.